When forensic science and too much free time come together, stuff like the Crystal Head Vodka Bottle Face happens.
Using a skull-shaped bottle of Crystal Head Vodka and facial approximation, a few forensic scientists show us what a guy with a head full of vodka might look like. Now, I’m no scientist, but it looks pretty accurate to me.
[via Neatorama]
It doesn’t happen often… But every once in a while, Foodiggity is successful at predicting the future. Even if Sriracha Vodka was as inevitable as the sun rising in the morning, it’s finally happened. You’re welcome, vodka-makers.
Brought to us by UV Vodka, the chili-flavored booze joins a long and questionable list of flavored vodkas. Now we just need the Ecto Cooler and Circus Peanut people to get to work.
Flavored vodka started innocently enough with lemon and orange. But lemon and orange begat vanilla, blueberry, and peach. Then, the trend of flavored vodkas descended into madness, leaving a path of destruction littered with clear liquids that tasted like cupcakes and waffles.
Nevertheless, since flavored vodkas have provided so much joy in the form of blog material — Foodiggity would like to pay it forward with a few flavor suggestions of our own. And, based on current food trends, these suggestions might even act as an accurate looking glass into vodka’s already doomed future. Please drink this in responsibly.
At the time of this writing, there is no other food item on the planet with a more rabid fan base than Sriracha. So, it only makes sense that the flavored vodka people find a way to make cock-vodka happen. Pair it with: Anything… Just like actual Sriracha.
Carnival grub on-the-go gets a much needed upgrade. Deep-fried corn batter with notes of salty tubed meat — now with the bonus sting of 40% alcohol. Pair it with: Ketchup and mustard chasers.
We’re not sure what flavor Circus Peanuts are supposed to be, and we don’t care. Make the vodka neon orange with a clown on the bottle, and we’re in. Pair it with: Shame.
The long-lost neon green beverage makes another comeback. And, what better spokesman could there be than an incoherent cockeyed ghost? Pair it with: Caffeinated marshmallows.
Nutella should be placed on everything. So, if there’s going to be any new vodkas, Nutella needs to be involved. It might not be the best choice for breakfast, but then again, neither is Nutella. Pair it with: Cereal, eggs, toast, or anything to help remind you that it’s still morning.
Raw fish and alcohol go great together. What’s this ‘saki’ you speak of? Well that had a good run, because sushi vodka is inevitable. You can even serve it warm, we don’t care. Pair it with: Shots of soy and miso.
Sure, we could buy separate Bloody Mary mix, but that just sounds like a lot of work. Get vodka that’s already flavored like spicy tomato juice. If necessary, throw in a cheeseburger for an extreme version. Pair it with: Celery, a cheeseburger, sriracha vodka.
So there you have it, folks. What are some other flavored vodkas you’d like to see become a reality? And, would you drink any of the fictional flavored vodkas seen above?
Moooove over, flavored vodka, there’s a new ridiculous drink concept in town. Black Cow Vodka uses milk instead of grain to make the formerly Russian and respectable clear alcohol.
Using a process that separates the cow’s milk into curds and whey, the curds are then used for cheese and the whey fermented to make a beer. A special yeast converts the milk sugar into alcohol, then the milk beer is distilled and treated to a secret blending process. The vodka is then triple filtered and finished, before being hand bottled. But we still can’t explain Peanut Butter & Jelly Vodka.
In a world where peanut butter and jelly, and glazed donut-flavored vodka exists — it’s good to know that there’s still some good old-fashioned vodka-flavored vodka. Maximus Vodka is bringing the testosterone back to clear liquors, and have created an ad campaign to help convince us that it’s still very manly to drink the stuff.
To help drive the point home even further, American artist Mort Künstler was commissioned to supply illustrations of square-jawed scruffy men doing manly things. The accompanying copy challenges the male viewer to stop being such a sissy — using a hard-edged font usually reserved for car magazines and Steve McQueen’s business cards. Drink up, nancy.
[via 22 Words]
