Dr. Pepper, already rumored to contain unicorn tears, has all but confirmed this with Unicorn Dr. Pepper.
The labels are part of the doctor’s “Pick Your Pepper” campaign, where you can find a unique label to fit your personality. Although each bottle contains the same wonderful Dr. Pepper, the unicorn label will always be the most appropriate. You know, because of the tears.
Since women were recently awarded their own beer by backwards-thinking marketing execs, then it only seems fair that men receive a beverage that they didn’t ask for. Enter something called Dr Pepper Ten — a ‘diet’ soft drink that packs only 10 calories into its very manly gun metal gray can.
As if having just built a treehouse, the marketing campaign hangs a rather prominent sign of “No Women Allowed”. And if the sad display of machismo seen in the ads, or the attempt to co-opt a diet soda were not embarrassing enough, Dr Pepper Ten’s Facebook page will literally not let females in. That will teach them to try to drink our low-calorie beverage!
When supermarkets and dimestore soda companies need to genericize brand names, it’s easy enough to just call it ‘Cola’, or ‘Root Beer’. However, as seen in this extensive gallery, it’s when the brand bastardization involves Dr. Pepper that the creativity knows no bounds.
Well, not really — it’s as simple as adding ‘Dr.’ to any word. Especially if that word has nothing to do with brown carbonated sugar water.
[Gallery, via Consumerist]
