Real world problem… You have so much unicorn, but you’re just not sure what to do with it. A Fourteenth Century English cookbook by Geoffrey Fule was recently discovered, and is here to help. Fule was a royal cook himself, so he knows his unicorn.
Fule suggests marinating the majestic beast in cloves and garlic, then roasting it on a griddle. Save the horn, just in case you’d like to make some unicorn stock.*
*We made that last part up. There’s no such thing as unicorn stock.